Emotions of the Heart
by Deona Lindholm
Summary: [Suikoden IV] This story has been revised for correction, as well as to link with Anithin's Motherland. Full Summary inside, rated for small violence and death. R&R Please!


_Emotions of the Heart_

_Author's note: The name for the Hero here is Zaron. Glen's POV. If my wording on the conversation is off, sorry. Also, this story has been revised, for Anithin and I will be linking our stories together._

Summary: Glen's POV, 1st person. Just what lies within the heart of the Commander of the Gaien Knights when an escort duty goes wrong?

As soon as the room emptied, with Lord Vingerhut going back to his mansion, Ramada, Snowe and Zaron leaving for the port, I turned to the only person left in the Audience Chamber. The woman in front of me, certainly pretty in her own way, was one of my subordinates. She always had her hair put up and wore that tiara with a tiny, garnet stone all the time. As I looked at her, the anger that I had kept in came back, in full force. In front of the client, she had made a blunder, potentially a serious one. Really, as one that is my second-in-command, she really ought to know better by now to make a mistake like this.

As soon I was certain that everyone was out of earshot, I growled at her, "You fool! Nasel birds are never to be mentioned in the presence of outsiders." You never knew when the outsider you said it to was an enemy spy that would use it against you. Again, as a Vice-Commander, Katarina should know better than this.

The woman in front of me balked, and appropriately so, then murmured, "Please excuse me…"

At this, I took a deep breath to calm myself. Although she had made a blunder, there was no reason to strike out at her. After a quiet nod, she walked over to me and took out a single letter. Earlier, I had read it and had only frowned a bit. Ramada had been brought to us by Lord Vingerhut, Snowe's father. The man and his entourage had been attacked by monsters on the way home from Middleport, and his cargo was spices…or so he said. The Lord wanted his son assigned captaincy, and since there was nothing dangerous being hauled, I saw no problem with it.

Katarina continued, "So, Commander, what do you make of the communiqué?" and handed it to me.

I took it from her hand, "I read it…" and proceeded to read it again. As I did so this time, I felt a very cold, sharp feeling in my gut. In all the years of my service to Gaien, I had learned to trust that feeling. It'd saved me so many times before for me to do otherwise.

"Considering the ship's course," I continued, "We cannot ignore the potential threat it poses to that Orark marine transport." The feeling grew _just_ a little more intense.

She nodded and added, "According to the report, the ship in question has 6 masts."

That was disturbingly familiar, that ship in the communiqué. If I remember correctly, it's the flagship of…

"Could it belong to Pirate Brandeau, who has been raiding our waters lately?" Katarina continued.

There was no way possible that I could avoid that question.

"He said that he had no important cargo, so I saw no problem in naming Snowe the captain, but…" My voice trailed off. All those new Knights. Kital, Feran, Snowe…Zaron…

That surprised her, and it showed in voice and face. "Commander… in other words, you assigned Snowe captaincy while you lack confidence in his abilities?"

She's certainly perspective, I'll give her that much. At times, I really dislike the circumstances involving the existence of the Knights.

Quietly, I admitted, "Our Lord is also the owner of the Marines Academy. There will be times when I cannot gainsay him." _That_ was a somewhat public secret, amongst the higher officers. After a quiet, mental chuckle over her reaction to that, I added, "but it seems that I made a wise decision to send Zaron with him, just in case…"

That feeling in my gut grew even stronger, and I decided. I somehow _knew_ that I had to go to them, and quickly. If not, this might well become another Troy all over again.

"Vice-Commander," I ordered, hearing the tension and firmness in my tone, "Prepare a fast ship for me immediately. I'll select a small crew and pursue Snowe."

"Yes, sir!"

"I have a vaguely bad feeling about this," I added quietly. _Vaguely…what an understatement!_ "I hope my worries are all for naught."

Within moments, I watched Razril grow smaller as the vessel proceeded on course. I knew the exact route that was being taken from here to Illuya Island. After all, like I said, the graduates are very familiar with the area. There had been plenty of training exercises over there.

It would be at least an hour, maybe two, before we would rendezvous with the escort vessel. As we sailed, I let my thoughts drift…and linger on two of the top graduates of this newest class.

Snowe was one of them, being the first son of Vincent, the Lord of Razril. Ever since he was a child, he had been, so to speak, raised as any child of nobility. In my view, most of those were spoiled rotten. Not that I ever would say so, of course. As he grew older, he had decided to enroll in the Marines Academy, to let his abilities serve Gaien, as I had heard him say numerous times. At first, I had been against it but…as I had said to my Vice-Commander, Vincent Vingerhut was the Lord of Razril and the owner of the Academy, _and_ Snowe's father. There was not much I could do about it, in the end. His skills with the sword grew, but…he is certainly flawed. At the mock battle, he had no sense of awareness. In a Knight, that is unacceptable. In a Captain of the Knights, it was downright fatal.

The other one…his past was very much a mystery to anyone. Vincent and a few of his fishermen were on their way to Obel on a visit and one of the fishermen found him in the ocean, and from the looks, he had just fallen in. The man, without any thought, had jumped into the ocean and pulled the child out, making the water come out of the tiny lungs. The little child had just been a small step away from a certain death and, for once, Vincent didn't censure him. On the spur of the moment, the man named the child Zaron.

As the fisherman was one in the Lord's employ, Vincent took it upon himself to raise Zaron. Although, I knew that even though that young lad grew up with Snowe, he was regarded by the family as an indentured servant. Even though the Lord's son was friends with him, I could see that he thought of the orphan as only somewhat better than a servant, too. I felt surprise, as well as a little warmth when I learned that the young lad had enrolled along with Snowe.

If I were to choose which of those two I preferred the most, I would have, at the time, been hard pressed for an answer.

"C-Commander!" I heard one of the crew call faintly.

"Yes?"

"There's a smallboat a short distance from here. Looks like the boat's one of ours."

"Change course and intercept. I want to know what's going on," I replied.

As the boat grew nearer, I was able to see the occupant…and what I saw alarmed me.

"Hm…? Is that Snowe!" I asked and peered again. Yes, it _was_ Snowe, by himself!

I had a sick feeling enter me upon seeing him by himself. I didn't want to think about what it meant, although as the Commander of the Knights of Gaien, I had to. After all, Snowe was the captain.

"…ommander! It's horrible! The ship, the shiiip!" I hear him yelling, wincing some at the same time. The look in his eyes was one of panic.

"Get him onboard. Now!"

A million thoughts at once ran through my head as I listened to Snowe's report, as well as a million feelings. The Knights had been ambushed by a mysterious vessel, one with 6 masts. _No…it was Brandeau!_ I had to crush the thought as I continued to listen. And the further that Snowe got in his tale, the more I began to feel anger…sharp anger. According to him, his right arm became immobile and injured, and upon the second shot, he had ordered to return to port at once, as well as to abandon the Orark ship. The crew was shocked, of course, and Zaron had made the decision to fight, not flee. Snowe saw this as mutiny and had left the ship.

_The nerve! The son of the Lord, abandoning mission and crew, leaving the Orark vessel to die, **plus** turned tail! And as he tucked tail beneath his legs and ran, a simple orphan had taken command of the ship and gave the orders to fight back!_

I made no attempt to mask my fury as I confirmed, "Incredible…you're saying you just went and abandoned your ship and crew!"

His eyes went wide as he spluttered, "I know, but…b-but my arm, it couldn't move, you understand!"

I had heard enough of this. A selfish, self-serving, spoiled, _coward_! I growled and raised a fist, slugging him in the face.

He looked very shocked and puzzled, to say the least.

"You coward!" I spat out, "What kind of captain abandons his crew to save himself?. The captain is the _last_ one to _leave_!" Any captain worth their salt, unlike this excuse, would know that already.

"B-but sir…! My arm, it really couldn't move! _Look!_"

"This is pointless!" I growled and motioned for the crew to resume course, full speed.

As the others nodded and left, I gazed to my left, where Snowe had come from. _Now_ I knew who I would prefer the most. Certainly not Snowe, who had dishonored himself and the Knights. No, Zaron was certainly the best, and by far.

I also realized something else in that moment. Call it silly, call it what you will…but when Snowe told his story, I felt my heart swell with pride over the young orphan's actions, as well as felt even more worried and ill over he thought that Brandeau might…

Most would say that I'm supposed to be impartial when it comes to the Knights, to a degree. I don't care if it's seen as anything less, but I realized that I truly love Zaron as a son.

As I gazed, I said quietly, my voice rough, "Don't die…" My thought echoed, _Don't die. Everyone…Zaron…stay alive._

I then turned back to one of my men and Snowe, then growled, "Get this spineless coward off my ship."

"Commander Glen! The Knights…" one of the officers exclaimed. It was a very short time after Snowe departed in disgrace when we found the ships. The Orark vessel was departing, and quickly. One of Brandeau's ships was in pieces, but enough was in the water to identify it. The other enemy vessel was in flames, but close enough to board…and as we came closer, I saw that they _had_ been boarded. The Knight's ship…was also on fire.

I whispered a prayer and ordered, "Two of you come with me."

There were two "Yes, sir" replies as two of the crew's best came forward. As soon as we were able to, we quickly boarded the remaining besieged vessel.

We were shocked by what we saw. Crew and enemy corpses alike littered the decks…as well as lots of what could only be described as ashes, and the scent of human skin burned in the air.

_There has to be survivors!_ "You two check the rest of the ship!"

As the others went in different directions, I broke out in a run. _Zaron, don't die on me!_

My eyes widened in shock as I approached the spot nearest the cabin.

Standing, but not steadily was a very familiar pirate. _Brandeau, and he's advancing towards…_ In front of him, collapsed on the deck, was the last person I wanted to see there.

_ZARON!_

"No!" I spoke, tone rough with pain as well as rage. I drew my sword and charged at the, the…murderer. I would avenge the dead, all of them. As I went into striking range, he turned and raised his own blade, but I executed a blow, one that would, at the least, cause serious injury and, at most, be fatal.

As Brandeau collapsed behind me, I hurried towards the still form, praying that at least _he_ had survived. I kneeled, scooping him up, and checked him out.

_Please…_

I let loose a breath of relief when I saw that he was merely unconscious.

"He's all right. He's still breathing!" I said quietly, then did something that I very rarely had done in my life.

As I sat him up, I wrapped my arms around him in a heartfelt, relieved hug and felt a pair of small tears slip from my eyes.

The pirate, the others…_everything_ could wait for a moment. I simply wanted to be relieved that there had been survivors, that the one I love as a son was still alive.


End file.
